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Kim Meninger

Is a bad work experience from your past haunting your present?

Is a bad work experience from your past haunting your present?

Have you experienced a workplace where you felt undervalued, disrespected, or unsafe?


If you have, you aren’t alone. According to the American Psychological Association’s 2023 Work in America Survey, over 1 in 5 working adults have experienced harm to their mental health at work, and 22% reported experiencing harassment at work in the past 12 months.


It can feel like an incredible relief to leave a negative work experience and move forward in your career. But you could find yourself stuck if you aren't mindful of how your past influences your present.


In this post, we'll unpack the sneaky ways a bad work experience might keep you from career fulfillment and strategies for overcoming it.


First, let’s talk about the impact of a psychologically unsafe work environment.


Psychological safety, as defined by Harvard scholar Amy C. Edmondson, refers to “a shared belief that the team is safe for interpersonal risk-taking.” In a psychologically safe organization, contributors at all levels feel secure enough to be their best selves and do their best work.


Unfortunately, there are workplaces in which psychological safety isn't present. A psychologically unsafe work environment can lead to self-doubt, insecurity, and hypervigilance. As a result, your brain develops protective mechanisms to keep you safe in that space, such as:


  • Keeping quiet to avoid disagreement

  • Being protective of information

  • Micromanaging others

  • Hiding mistakes or shifting blame to others

  • Not sharing novel ideas for fear of ridicule

  • Not showing up as your authentic self

  • Not reaching out for help when you need it


The impact of a bad work environment doesn’t magically disappear when we leave.

Imagine a child touches a hot stove by accident and burns their hand. In the future, they will likely stay away from not only hot stoves but cold stoves as well because of the fear of experiencing that same pain.


Objectively approaching your next work environment can be incredibly challenging if you've experienced a toxic work environment and developed these protective habits. Like the child who touched the stove, your brain doesn’t recognize that your new environment is "cold," so it continues to protect you.


Past experiences stay with you. And when you fail to acknowledge and work through them, they color the way you show up moving forward. As a coach, I see this manifest in a number of ways, including clients who:


  • Find themselves moving from position to position and searching for a sense of success, collaboration, and connection but never finding it because of the negative lens they have for all work environments.

  • Are stuck in self-preservation mode and holding themselves back in new roles for fear of sharing ideas, leveraging teammates, and being their amazing, authentic selves.


  • Are consuming lots of energy reacting to situations in the workplace that are objectively neutral but are being run through the mental circuits built in a toxic workplace.


The good news is there are concrete steps you can take to trade victim mentality for empowered action.


It makes sense to want to leave a bad situation far, far behind you. But there is so much value in spending the time to heal and address the pain that you’ve experienced.


You can approach new roles with a healthier mindset by acknowledging what you've gone through and identifying the coping mechanisms that no longer serve you.


Leave the bad.

If you are being abused, disrespected, or otherwise poorly treated, then by all means, get out of that situation or speak up. You have every right to a psychologically safe workplace and the first step is to leave a bad situation, even if it feels hard.


Take the lessons.

While thinking about a bad workplace situation can be painful, it's crucial. Find the support and structure you need, whether from a therapist, a coach, or a friend, so the emotions don’t overwhelm and flood you. Then ask yourself:


  • What lessons can I take away?

  • What strengths have I developed as a result of my experience?

  • What boundaries do I need to set in my next role?

  • What qualities do I want in my next manager, organization, and role?


Develop awareness.

As you enter a new organization, pay attention to what triggers those protective responses in your head. Try to pause and ask yourself, "Am I responding objectively to the current situation, or am I reacting through the lens of past trauma?” In reflecting, you allow yourself time to respond rather than react. Eventually, you may even feel safe enough to open up to your supervisor or colleagues.


Remember—you deserve to bring your whole self to work and feel fulfilled and safe while there.


Leaving a bad situation is hard, but it’s the first step to better things. The next step is reflecting and understanding how to move forward. Ultimately, this awareness helps you transform struggles into strength and turn lessons from the past into workplace satisfaction in the present!


If you need a coach to help you process, move forward, and own your career success, I'd love to discuss how I can help.


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